Mini Me

Hey!  I'm down here!  No, further down... that's it... bit further... squint a bit... Hi!! How's thing's?

Yeah, I feel pretty small at the moment.  I feel like my tiny lungs and my not-so-classically-trained diaphragm are struggling to make my voice heard.  I'm trying to grow.  Trying to take in all the artistic vitamins and minerals that have made those that inspired me grow big and strong and finally tower over those that tried to stunt their growth.  But I wonder if my voice will ever be heard.

"Oh shit!", you're thinking, "another out of work actor feeling sorry for himself; quick click on the 'Classifieds' section on the left and see what the hell that is".  And you're right.  Sorry about that.  But, don't click 'Classifieds'... that's what they want you to do.  I promise I'll be good.

The sketch show was really taking off.  Every outing it had got had been excellent.  The buzz of making new people laugh felt invigorating.  Even "industry people" (whatever the fudge that means) have been taking an interest.  But then... just one bad gig in the arse-end of nowhere and I'm doubting my whole career.  Why do we do that?

Why don't I focus on the positives?  We've created our own show.  We've written, directed, rehearsed, promoted, starred in and performed in front of paying audiences that genuinely showed their appreciation and injected the laughter drug into my veins.  And then we do a gig and a only a few people turn up [picture me in my dressing room/ dingy cupboard deflating like a beach ball just before I go onstage].  One bad gig and I'm questioning my whole career.

I'm down here by your ankles.  Shouting up to everyone "HEY, I MAY BE SMALL BUT MAYBE I HAVE BIG IDEAS!  MAYBE IF YOU LET ME SOAK UP SOME OF THAT LIGHT I WILL GROW!".  I hope I don't get trodden on. 

Right.  Rant over.  Blog summed up = boy feels proud, boy feels dejected, boy finds soap box, boy moves on.

Please move on with me.  Write a letter to that director you've always wanted to work with, get the ball rolling on that screenplay idea you had, pick up the phone and Make. Something. Happen.  If anyone is reading this then go and do it.  Re-energise yourself and spend some time doing whatever you need to do to grow.  Puff your chest out and make your voice heard. 

See you at the top.