The past week has shown us that there are subtle differences between the ordering of a platter of meat patties from Greggs and the hosting of an American Talent Show.

Most notably, the purchasing of greased pastry goods does not require elocution lessons, the latter possibly more so.

Oh, tiny Cheryl Cole, how we were all rooting for you after that troublesome year of nasty little insects. Or Ashley Cole as he’s otherwise known. For a while there it seemed things were well and truly looking peachy.

Then along parades Simon Cowell, aka Mr Power Nipps, with his areolas of judgement, shattering your dreams of American glory by callously firing you from the US version of The X Factor a mere week after you’ve begun. What a turncoat.

Although no actual statement has been released as to why the Geordie lass has been dismissed from her talent show duties, there’s a bounty of speculation. Some suggest that she failed to conjure any chemistry with fellow judge Paula Abdul, (perhaps they had a scrap in the bogs), others that she preferred to stay in her hotel room eating digestives (unlikely) or egg whites (probably), right down to the fact that she sounded like a camp dock worker who xenophobic/hard of hearing Americans failed to understand.

Of course talent is subjective. Some might speculate that you may need to possess a bit to be able to comment on others. I myself scoff at this assumption and point an accusing finger to the likes of scathing critics everywhere.

Yet, what this whole fandango does highlight is that no matter how successful you are, no matter how intimidating your bouffant has become, even if it’s evolved so high it now resembles a Wookie, everyone meets knock backs.

Some of the most prolific historical figures have overcome painful obstacles and made it out the other side stronger, richer and far more powerful than before. 

Take Einstein for example. While he may resemble the Weetos professor, he is also recognised as an advocate for dyslexics everywhere. Whereas back in the 19th century he was probably assigned to the FuzzBuzz room with the kids that smell of bonfires, today he would have been kitted out with a free laptop, scanner and all the printing costs he’d ever incur. I like to think that as Albert handed over his theory of relativity, he was humming Christina Aguilera’s Can’t Hold Us Down (or the 19th century equivalent.)

Everyone from Monroe to Monet has faced their share of setbacks, with folk either hating on them, or advising they let their dreams go altogether. Even Sydney Poitier was told at an audition that he should find a career washing dishes, getting possibly the sweetest revenge by becoming the first black actor to ever win an Oscar.

While getting fired or facing criticism can be, at best, slightly inconvenient, at worst, like a solid fist to your pride, we should remember these iconic folk. Try telling yourself that better things wait in the wings, as long as you’re willing to brush down your grazed filthy knees and try again. 

Perhaps in this instance Cheryl should remind Simon that every generation needs their Rab C Nesbitt; just pop on the subtitles and problem solved.

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